Six Figure Guilt, Loneliness, and the Conscious Healing Crisis

Six Figure Guilt, Loneliness, and the Conscious Healing Crisis

Clearing. Cleansing. Hoping. Praying in the New Money Paradigm Shift. Intense shifting happening on the planet in regard to money, or at least in my world.
I am shifting from a ME paradigm into a WE paradigm. And while it’s beautiful, it’s also frigging painful and uncomfortable!

I had a dream about a former biz coach of mine earlier this year, and she was wealthy and famous. She had a home the size of a football stadium, famous celeb clients from LA, and her hair was shiny and perfect. But she was alone and miserable in her success, and the more rich and famous she became, the less people were able to truly see her, know her, and love her for her.

I could’ve been that! I used to want that!

I would subconsciously say “Love me for my success, love me for my body, love me for my wealth!” It was the little girl inside of me aching to be seen by her father.

In the dream my former coach was so sad, and alone, like a child wearing alone in her room, and I witnessed the emptiness she felt in her heart.

Because if love is money and you don’t share the wealth with many others who love (you, them, the New Earth, money itself) then what’s the point?

Something is shifting in me… I am falling more in love with dreaming up the new earth eco villages than I am with success, wealth, and looks (though I DO want it all as long as it’s in harmony with God/dess and Gaia).

I am on a path of Twin Flame Love and discovering who I am as a spirit, and having a body who needs resources. Who needs love.

I am unwilling to become super duper wealthy until I feel in my bones why I am doing this…

Money is not a big enough reason for us High-Healed Priestesses to become wealthy.

I have discovered that as a shaman and a BLI$$ness woman I have an immense capacity to rake in tons of dough. It’s easy for me. Yet is it sustainable for the planet for me to have several homes in exotic places, and is it healthy for everyone around me to witness my power if I don’t share it with them?

I have always wanted to be rich and famous, for as long as I can remember. I am both in love with and afraid of the reality that I am creating; as I receive large paychecks, become successful, and go on television I’ll continually be asking questions. What if living the American dream is actually unhealthy for me, for us, and for the planet? What if it’s not sustainable for everyone to become millionaires?
Am I going to rape the earth with my giant mansions with five car garages? And what if I send my kids to private schools that teach them that mental academics are more important and sacred than their own intuition, that success in the physical world is more important than success in their spiritual growth and happiness?

Can we really continue to grow our wealth as we grow our consciousness. And vice versa?

I do believe that their answers to these questions, and very good ones. But I don’t believe will figure it out all at once… I believe we have to have conversations, time for contemplation, and room for error. I also feel that other conscious millionaires and six-figure earners have a responsibility and helping the newbies guide the way and share feedback. Especially the vulnerable kind of where you have gone wrong and had to U-turn.

I recently ran into my former coach at a networking event. I felt a great deal of relief when she stood up in the group to share that she has been rewiring her business and taking a break because she is looking for more fulfillment. She’s looking for a more conscious and joyous path of doing business, and that the money is not enough. Thank God!

I am in the midst of a mid 6-figure crisis and I am figuring it out. Just sharing this feels like a blessing. I am so grateful for having this space to share my experience, fears, and wisdom. Namaste.IMG_0013.JPG